Saturday, March 20, 2010
Heartbroken
I'm heartbroken guys, My SIL just left. She decided to come tell me she found out yesterday that she's pregnant. She started to "fake" cry and I stopped her, asked what's wrong? She says she feel sorry for me. I told her to stop lying, she doesn't feel sorry for me. She wouldn't have been trying so hard right now if she did. She's a bitch, I'm so angry. I couldn't wait for her to leave. I totally broke down to DH, I don't know how I can go through another pregnancy and birth if it's not me. I don't know how to feel right now I'm devestated. STUPID WHOREEEEE!!!
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I also told her to be careful because of her blood pressure, she said she was crying over that because she's scarred. OMG what an idiot, she already knew that and the risks. Despite her doc telling her to wait and not to have another baby righ now she still kept trying. IDIOT.....I really believe she was trying to get pregnant b4 I did. I don't know what to do I'm so upset and I can't stop crying. I just went through this with my other brother and SIL who just had a baby 4 months ago. To think of going through this pain again is making my stomach feel sick. I am HEARTBROKEN. This sucks and it isn't fair, why does infertility have to exist??
ReplyDeleteKrissy...so sorry! In the last few years I have felt like I was in a race to get pregnant. One by one, it felt like everyone was racing right by me. It's such an awful feeling! I just wanted to let you know that I totally related to your post and that I'm thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteKrissy- That's tough. It never ends, does it? There's always someone else who is pregnant or just had a baby. You're right. It ISN'T fair for you to be childless... not after all you've gone through.
ReplyDeleteRight now, I'm trying to strengthen my friendships with the people in my life who DON'T have kids. That helps me cope. Also long walks (or any kind of exercise)can help me put things in perspective.
I hope you're feeling a bit better. You will get through this. You have your DH and all of us here to lean on. Hugs!
Krissy- So sorry. I know exactly how you feel. I dread the next time someone gets married. I am at least lucky that most of my friends are done having kids and their kids are older.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
In re-reading that post, I realized I said "married" instead of "pregnant." Interesting, because I am currently worried that my bff who is getting married in October will be preggo before me.
ReplyDelete