I'm a newbie, hear me roar

Hello ladies- I read the intro to this blog and it made me laugh out loud. I wanted to be part of it right away! I am so sick of this lollipop- cute fluffy puppy- baby dust- "yay let's all get our BFP" ladies on the IVF boards out there. I've been looking for more support in big-bad-internet land.

The sad, long version of my story can be found here:
Our Story

(And please, feel free to drop by/ follow/ whatever...)

But the short version is as follows:

Met hubby in 2001, love of my life
Married in 2003
Started trying to conceive on my birthday (yikes) end of 2005
Things aren't working by early 2006, see RE #1
A series of IUI's with clomid, then Follistim 2006-2008. All BFN. They think we ned IVF, we freak out. No one else we know has children then.
We take some time off, go to counseling, think about what we need.
2009- Switch RE's for work related reasons
2 IUI cycles with Femara. The second one is a BFP!
Scared but excited. We miscarry at 6 weeks in 6/2009.
Do two more IUI's, and get another BFP, but it's a chemical 8/2009.

We move on to IVF and long story short, our clinic dicked us around a bit, and we didn't get to cycle until Nov/Dec 2009. The IVF was disappointing. 10 retrieved, only 2 eggs were mature and fertilized. The one died right away. The other did make it to a 3 day transfer was a day behind. BFN.

IVF # 2 in March. Another cycle, same protocol (Long Lupron). My follies are all over the place in size. One dominant follicle (was like 4/ 5 cm at that point!) So they advise me to stop the cycle since we are out of pocket for this cycle.

Fast forward to the present:

Still waiting for AF from that failed cycle. It's been 6 weeks. We switched RE's, and I feel very positive about it. However, I feel kind of hopeless in general. This is getting tougher as time goes on, not easier! People are getting pregnant all around me, the biggest stab was my best friend who is unmarried/ totally unplanned. I feel so very stuck in my life, in my career, in my town I live in. I just want to shake it all up like a snowglobe or something and let it settle. But, this is where I am.

So yes, that's my story. Despite its depressive nature, I can still be happy and silly at times. Looking forward to getting to know you ladies. I love to blog instead of working.